Never bet on the Boston Celtics. The guys in green blew another big lead against the New Jersey Nets that snapped the Nets' 6 game losing streak and left the Celts scratching their heads. They lost the game down the stretch by running two goofy plays that ended up in a bad shot and a turnover. Just fire Doc and hire Bill Simmons to coach already.

The Nuggets offense looks unstoppable. They are just running everyone out of the building when they're playing fast, and Melo is killing the other team on his post ups when they play slow. Who needs Kmart when you have Eddie Najera, Joe Smith and Reggie Evans crashing the boards and grabbing nuts? (Oh wait, the latter is just Evans). Andre Miller is thriving on the open court, lobbing the ball like crazy. Camby is swatting shots like the ball was made of pure fart and grabbing rebounds like they were free sexy whores. Oh and JR Smith. Now he's a sexy pick for Most Improved. The guy is a perfect fit for a team that lacked athelticism and shooting from the 2 spot. The guy is averaging 18 a game. Who averages 18 a game playing alongside Melo? He's also hitting 3 threes a game. To top it all off, the guy has hops like crazy. The Nuggets are my sexy sleeper pick for this year. They just have that '04-05 Suns feel to them.

Is there anybody dressed more ridiculous in sports today than Montell Vontavious Porter? I mean what the fuck. What the hell is that outfit supposed to be? Futuristic? Haha. It reminds of about 10 years ago when Farooq Hasaan first came to the WWE. He had this funky looking outfit with a helmet that made him look like a gay gladiator from the year 3000.

Throw This Old Dog A Bone Please

Can we please hand over the Coach of the Year award to Jerry Sloan already? I know its probable that his Utah Jazz will eventually slowdown from its franchise best 11-1 start and finish as the 5-6th seed in the West and/or one of his three key bigs will go down with a serious injury (well, one of them is already down, but it’s not that serious. Not yet anyway.)

Did anyone even see this coming? Well, obviously not the people over at EA Sports, who have the Jazz rated at 75 on NBA Live 07. The Knicks on the other hand are rated 91, the Lakers 93, the Bulls 91 and the Heat 94. Of the four, only the Lakers have a respectable record.

Going back to Sloan, the guy should get some long overdue credit for continually maximizing his not-so-popular teams and turning them into a competitive bunch. Remember, this guy almost made the playoffs last year with Memo “The Turkish Bath” Okur as his franchise guy and a three-headed point guard combo of Keith McLeod, Milt Palacio and rook Deron Williams (more on him in a bit). How has Jerry Sloan not won a COY award? Wait, Doc Rivers has one? That guy who’s running the Boston Celtics into a downward spiral of mediocrity? He was Coach of the Year? Wow.

Jerry Sloan is making Carlos Boozer (22 and 12) and Deron Williams (19 and 9) look like a young Malone and Stockton. Yeah, Carlos Boozer the hairy second round pick and Williams that fat kid Sloan kept yelling at last year are playing like sure-fire All-Stars. The two are running a very efficient offense that’s second in the league in scoring (so much for the notion small-ball = higher scoring). Throw in the fact the Kirilenko has given them shit so far and they have a big hole at shooting guard (Sorry, Gordan Giricek, Ronnie Brewer and C.J. Miles), this team is theoretically far from 100%. Point is, Sloan, once again, has gotten the most of his seemingly ordinary club to lead them on top of a very tough Western Conference. And it’s not like they’ve been playing hacks. They’ve played the Suns twice, the Clippers, the Kings, the Warriors and the Rockets.

For the love of God, just give him the award now and give him his place in history, because sooner or later Boozer or Kirilenko will go down, or Deron Williams will start playing like a preoccupied fat kid again, or the curse of Karl Malone will haunt them into crapping their pants in crunch time. And when that happens, some goof like Doc Rivers will end up with the award again.

Now this was sick.